Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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