Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
