your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
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