idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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