I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
