Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
