i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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