ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
