youre lurking in front of me
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
