you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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