He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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