HIV tests are more positive than that guy
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize