Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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