Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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