i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Randomize
