we're blogging at a bar
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
