This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
