I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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