Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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