dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
