I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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