are you still at the devil's house?
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Randomize
