Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
