i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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