drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You need Xanax blowdarts
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
