How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
