dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize
