i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
