I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
