U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
