You really coming over, don't trick.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
