she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
