The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
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