As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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