I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
