"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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