i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
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