you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
