It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
