____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize