Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Houston, we have a squirter
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
