He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
