Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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