Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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