Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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