She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
The air was thick with penises
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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