your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Randomize
