and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
