I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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