just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize