wrigley field is MILF paradise
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize
