things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
